Ask Sarita For Men

Ask Sarita: Erection Issues

Sarita loves to answer your questions, so if there’s something you’d like her advice on, please email her and let her know if you are happy for it to be published (you can remain anonymous). Here she answers a question on: erection problems.
Dear Sarita,
I’m writing to you because of a problem I’m having with my erection. I’m a 33 year old man. For 6 months I’ve been in a relationship with a beautiful woman who is the same age as me and for 3 months everything was going great. Then I started having some pain while having sex and later I discovered it was because my foreskin was too tight. It has stretched and now is okay.
But now I’m having problems having and maintaining an erection. My girlfriend said she feels maybe I was abused sexually while I was a child and have blocked that memory, that’s why I’m having problems now. She wants more sex in a relationship and I also want it but I feel I have some block with the flow of sexual energy. At home sex was a taboo and my first sexual encounter happened when I was 27 so I know I might have some mental scars from my past. Do you have any advice about the situation?
Thank you,
Hello Vijay
Thank you for your question.
The tightness of the foreskin is common in young boys and is easily remedied by the young boy playing with his foreskin, stretching it, massing it, etc. This can be done in the bath, and before long, he will have a flexible foreskin. The fact that you have this problem as an adult, means that you must not have played with your foreskin as a child to help stretch it. You say you have now healed this condition, but you don’t say how. Was it through massage?
About erection problems, this can have multiple causes.
For some men, it happens because they have had a wounding relationship leading to lack of self-esteem, which can affect the erection.
For others, it is because they drink beer, which has hops in it that mimic female hormones. Beer is very good for breast-feeding women, not so good for men! If a man drinks too much beer he can become impotent.
For other men, it can be because he has a belly that is too big, leading to lax muscles in his pelvic floor. These muscles are needed to hold the erection. If a man is fat or has a fat belly, he can simply go on a good cleanse and healthy diet and should get his erection back. He will of course, also need to do exercises for his pelvic floor.
Another cause can be repressed anger. Anger is vital life force energy. If it is held back, it can lead to a dullness, lethargy and lack of energy. To solve this, 21 days dynamic meditation, or 10 days pillow beating meditation, should do the trick!
Still another cause can be ill health, or being on medication which affects libido. Many medications have the effect of lowering libido. Always read the fine print on any prescriptions!
Another cause can be too much recreational drugs. I have met two men who had become impotent after taking the drug ecstasy too many times…. too much of anything is never a good idea. Balance is needed for our body, mind and emotions to be in optimal health.
In general, if there is erection problem, and you are in good health, you can work with your emotions to bring balance. It is also helpful to do massage on a regular basis, or practise the caressing meditation with your partner. Relaxing together with your partner is important, not worrying about performance. Usually if you relax and tune in together to the union of your body energies on all levels, your lingam will soon get the idea that it could be very pleasurable to connect sexually.
If you have sexual abuse issues, there is an excellent treatment in Colour Light Therapy to heal this trauma. You can have a session with Soham in London for this, or with me if you happen to turn up in one of my groups sometime.
I wish you all the best.
Love Sarita

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